i may have outdone myself with my last entry here. it truly was the epitome of what i envision this space to be – juicy, mysterious, secretive, raw and open in all the enticingly closed ways. so what next?
theory. concept. wonder.
so here’s something that hits all three of those categories – we are all absolutely one thousand percent in our own worlds. it’s never been more clear to me. i’ll give you the whole ripe story of how we got here.
a few months ago, i made a really good friend. 0 to 100, so much alignment and she checked so many boxes of what i needed at that point in my life. but over time, it started to become clear how differently we operated.
prime example: she runs into an ex she hugs them, gives them every sweet detail of her life, lets them re-enter her world. i run into an ex, good luck getting a word or a look out of me. one isn’t wrong, just completely different operating systems.
but then there is a point where it becomes wrong, details unnecessary but just know you’re reading words from a high value woman who stands by her worth no matter what. and here’s where it got interesting, wrong after wrong just kept happening. like really nasty things lol. it should’ve hurt but it didn’t hit, i couldn’t make sense of it.
so i wrote about it. and that’s when it clicked – why take things personally when we all are just operating in our own worlds? this is ultimate peace. in her world, she doesn’t see a thing and that’s ok. in my world, my muchness is so rock solid nothing could ever shake it.
and then eventually it does hurt because we are human. as deep and soulful as we might be, we are also simple and emotionally rooted entities. take it from someone who buried her emotions so far down that they eventually took her over and restarted her life – let yourself be led by your emotions. it is the gift of being human.
so here we are at the hurt part. let me tell you to hurt from a detached space and to just feel it is so completely different than to be angry and upset with the other party. have yourself your own party, that’s where you upgrade.
present day – i have no idea what i’ll do about this friend situation. what have i done so far? boundaries. my god do i love my boundaries and any excuse to stand behind them. i’ve had to push myself to come out of those boundaries and let things in, but when the universe gives me an opportunity to let those boundaries be really tall – i will seize it.
self respect. that’s what that is. it’s also fear but when you’re aware of that and you know when to stand taller than your walls, it’s fearlessness. the greatest things in life are a paradox.
moral of this story, what a crazy life experience to all physically be living in the same world while also very obviously living in our own worlds. if there’s seven billion of us, there’s seven billion different worlds colliding on the same physical plane. what a fascinating thing.
some worlds will collide forever, some mesh for a fleeting period. your world is always yours – free and open and fully created by the power of you. live big, live bold, live limitless.
-G
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